Love & Expectations

Sometimes, I wonder what the wive's, of great leaders, expections are going into the marriage. Are they prepared for the lonely nights and all the publicity. Do they understand what they will be sacrificing on a daily basis?

What are your expectations when entering a relationship? What meaning does the word "love" hold for you when you are either saying it or when it is being said to you?

The infamous love chapter in the Bible states,  "Love is patient,  love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

"Love never fails."-1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Basically, what can be derived from these passages, is that love is an outward (selfless) force and not an inward (selfish) one. When we choose to love someone, is it fair to place any expectation on him or her? Is it really love when we do that? And aren't the vows that are spoken during a marriage ceremony expectations? And what about my companionship needs regarding the emotional, mental, and physical aspect, how will they get met?

The original New Testament was written in Greek. When the word 'love' is translated, it appears agape in the original text. According to renowned Author C.S. Lewis and his book "The Four Loves", agape love is the love that sustains and lavishes itself  upon a relationship regardless of the circumstance. He recognizes this love as the highest form.

Abigail Adams was the first wife of President John Adams. She was known for her outspokenness on the subjects of women's education and property rights along with her extensive letters to husband during the Revolutionary War and his stay in Philadelphia with the Continental Congress.

She is quoted as saying "How difficult the task to quench the fire and the pride of private ambition, and to sacrifice ourselves and all our hopes and expectations to the public weal! How few have souls capable of so noble an undertaking! How often are the laurels worn by those who have had no share in earning them! But there is a future recompense of reward, to which the upright man looks, and which he will most assuredly obtain, provided he perseveres unto the end."

I admire her for saying this, because not only would she understand the sacrifice of her own "private ambition", and how she might lose him in the war, but she also knew that he was sacrificing his own life for our future and the independance and betterment of this great nation.

Perhaps we don't consider the selflessness of our founding fathers and their wives enough. Thank you to all the brave leaders and men and women who have fought so that I may freely write this post! I feel deeply grateful and deeply loved.

                                                     Abigail Adams


*Next week, I will go more indepth on the four loves and probably expound on agape love.